I'm torturing myself here.. Can't you see I'm Bleeding?

Assalamualaikum....

Hmmm.... This is my first day in second semester in KLMU...and what a suprise! I wasted a lot of money to come to class and my class got postponed! Wow what a damn waste of time.. Hmmm... Like always, I cant get through day without singing! So, I went to karaoke and wasted money there. Stupid as always. Something else happen but I guess its too naive to said it out loud here.

Ok times up! I need to get my mood pumped up! So, I called my friend to come down and listen to me playing my guitar and suddenly I had this feeling of uncomfortable when I saw her.... Haihhhhh... Its too hard to forget about something you dying to get and lost it along the way.. I hate this feeling man.. Feel like I am a total idiot try to chase something that I will never get.
I played my act of not care but everyone know I care... Its hard to hide that kind of feeling. I guess I need A LOT of time to get over this. I hope this will be over sooner than I think.

Well... I look back at the different angle and saw a few mistakes that i made... For sure, It was me all along who always acted stupid at the wrong place and at the wrong time... This might be hurting her a lot.. She got a lot of problem and I just add another problem for her to think..
Its normal for her to act like she did to me, for I am acting kind of crazy because of this unrequited dreams... which already shattered her heart and mine too..

BUT!!!!

I know its hurting you but its KILLING me...!!

Hmmm... I guess thats all for today.. I think this can be enough to ease the pain on my shoulder..
Never blame her..please... For I am all to blame....

Well then, Cherrioooo...

Assalamualaikumm...

End of the beginning.... or is it the other way around?

Assalamualaikum.....

Thats it! my final exam finally over, and I never said this a lot but I really satisfied by my performance this semester. I target so high this semester.. What a relieve that its over. But sadly, I got only a week holiday. On 18 January, it will be a new semester.. Yeah! bring it on! can't wait..

Really guys, this is totally boring moment for me as I only looking at my laptop and typing this word.. Bahhh.. I wish I could get back in time where all the happiness are still there. I wish for my sorrow ends now. Well, I better work it out right away!
Wait, I never said my wish for new year yet am I? hmmm... well, my wish for this new year is "I want to realize all my dream and will never let my emotion gets in my way!"

Okay then.. Hmmm... This week is a bad as the other week, nothing pathethic really, just me and my emotions, not thinking straight now.. Haha.. Well I had enough of this lousy chase so I ended it weeks ago.. Well, now I'm all free! Phewww.... what a relieve that its over, (wait..did I just said it two times?)
Hmmm..I cant think of anything right now.. Just this>>

"Never fight Fire with Fire" Meaning? Hmm... well, if you got angered by someone who is angry, dont fight him/her with anger too.. fight with love... Wahahaha... Thats how you do it master.. fire will burn bigger with fire, but will dissappear with water.. so play nice.. but dont throw water at your friend face! thats idiotic! haha... well enjoy life! take good care of every moment left in your life.. never waste a second!

Well then...Cherrioooo!!

Shahrul Azli's Commentaries of the Phase V4 : Finally, I end my chapter...

Assalamualiakum....

Well, this is my Final exam week, but its not that bad. The worst part is strictly personal regarding my life. ITS DEPRESSING THAN EVER!! My pathethic chase has ended badly for me.. I am beginning to think that she is not the one for me...

Lat night I ended my hope, because she didnt hold up her end of the bargain.. She broke her promise of not to couple with anyone for 2 and a half years... I hate myself right now..
I hate chasing shadow... BROKENHEART!!!

Ok thats it im done...
I got no mood to write anymore...

Assalamualaikumm.......

Welcome to the FUTURE...2010

Assalamualaikum...

Yeah...Finally We reach a new decade..2010! New life and new beginning. Never waste this moment, not for a second!.. Hmm...for me, this is the first time I had a new years celebration outside my hometown (penang).. This year I celebrate in KLCC. What a blast it is. Hanging out with my friends, enjoying fireworks, nothing more, nothing less..
As I stared out the window from my room, I can really feel the change in the air, well more like the change in my sense of life. This is the only year that I feel really blast out! because I can feel the change in my life, my style, my way of thinking and many other stupid bragging stuff.
I never really prepared for this year, but as we know, time never wait for us.

Do you ever feel like we kind off chasing the time all this while? I do. I feel like this world is moving faster and faster every time the sun set.. I dont know why, maybe it is time for me.. but I dont know, I cannot foresee the future. We getting older, and complicated, so make sure we prepare and ADAPT! yes thats the key word: Adaption to the surrounding always best to keep on surviving this merciless world. I doubt you guys want to hear me blabbling about this, so bottomline is, I am not ready! but i will adapt to this. I really wanna write more but unfortunately i am still in gloomy mood, because of the recent tragedy i mentioned in the commentaries.

Quotes of the week "Someone who didn't understand about life will feel he's never change at all"
I dont need to say much about this, Its all there, just read it.

Well then, Cheerriiioooo...!!
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010!! Remember every mistakes u made in 2009 so that you will not do it again in 2010...!!

Assalamualaikum..!

Life Suck?? well..ADAPT TO IT!!.

Assalamualaikum....

Huarghhh its being a tired week for me..I hate monday, just like everyone else. 4th of January will be my Final Examination. Im all out dude! I guess this time I know the drill so Im not so nervous like i used to be long ago..hehe..
Well, nothing much to say since I wrote a very long story before and I hate to repeat myself over and over again about how much this week suxx! hmmm.... well everyone got their own problem right?
Anyway, This week I've been thinking about some crazy stuff, like is there a possibility to bend time and space continuum? Haha..I guess I am crazy right now, desperate enough to undo every dumb move I made in this life.. Well, like some people used to say, If we can go back in time, then every decision we made has no meaning. So, instead of trying to change the past, try to adapt(i repeat this word a lot guys!) with making mistakes, and make and better future..
People make mistakes, and sometimes, they keep on making mistakes, thats what human do.. So, instead of insulting, and whatever bullshit u guys do, try forgive and forget if you can... okay... Get a life dude! Im stuck in this world long enough to know how hard it is... so ADAPT!

Quotes of the week "People who never make mistake never learn anything"

We can't avoid it, so try to adapt!! hehe...I told u i repeat this word often.

Well then, Cherrioo!!
Assalamualaikum....
"IM ALL OUT!!"

Shahrul Azli's Commentaries of the Phase V3 : Never get use to it..

Assalamualaikum....

Here I go again...The next chapter of commentaries about another phase of my life.. This past week had been the worst week of my life EVER... To begin, let me just say that, to be heartbroken is excruciatingly painful. It seems like all hope is lost. Maybe you can feel that I'm in terrifying depression phase right now, and you are right.
You see, I never fall into someone so often, most of the time I was playing all around because of the pain I suffered makes me feel that I'm not suitable for that kind of emotional feeling. However, fate always twisted us in a way only God knows, and I got trap in some emotion dilemma. Yes indeed, its all about girl. That's normal people! I'm a human being, and common logic says men need women. Well, whatever.

Back to my story, I met this lovely girl, whom I fall in love for the reason unknown to me. Maybe because of the similarities or "what they call it? aha.." Chemistry.. I never met someone so similar to me, from the way she live his life, her problem with herself, favorite song, and many other things I rather not write here. If you say, "what the hell, you will find another one like her!" Well, suck it! I'm all out dude. I repeat again, I rarely give a shit about girl, but now I give a full attention on this chicks! Its like a rhetorical love. She treat me so nicely that I can spend my whole life just staring at her.

Well, the worst part of this story, well, she know that I like her, or should I say, really2 like her! and she says she like me too, and started to give me hope BUT that's where the weather change! I came to realize that she was just trying to make me happy, by lying to me. I stopped seeing her, I did, but she keeps on coming and coming that I couldn't stop my self from being hurt.
What I mean by being hurt is that she will hang out with me and my friends but she will bring her own male friend and start flirting with each other (like putting his hands around her shoulder, holding hands, whispering and whatever shit). I usually dont give a shit about all this but the fact that she know I care bout makes me feel sick in my stomach. She keeps on hurting me over and over again ever since she know i like her. What kind of pathetic behaviour is that??

Well, enough of this, I will be better somehow. Just that now I always got into bitter place in the broken dream. Maybe this is a test for me from The Ruler of All.. to see if I'm strong enough to handle my emotion. Well, I pray that I can survive this. Amin.

Phrases of the week: "If you give a light to someone, make sure you keep the light steady, because if its too low, the light will go off, and if too strong, the light will burn him."

I use light to describe hope.. as the matter of hope, too many hope unrealized will destroy us. I will say this once, never takes love as a small matter, because one day you will know how painful it is to be heartbroken. If you already feel it, then you will understand. If you never feel it, try not to condemn someone who is.

Well, I don't have enough mood today to write more..see you on the next chapter.
Assalamualaikum...



"Khilaf - Apit"
"Sayang - Menara"
"Tunjukkan aku - Boneca"
"Kurelakan dikau pergi - Okay"

Artists use lie to tell the TRUTH!

Assalamualaikum....

This is very normal day to write a blog which I left a few months back. This is really hard. I dont even know how to start. Well, here goes nothing...! I moved out of Diamond Square, Setapak, or should I say, evicted! By the gods! I dont think anyone would dare to toss me out of my lovely house than the management, but sadly, it is the management who kick US out. We now live peacefully in a narrow, yet social Kondominium Sentul Utama. A new journey begins. This coming week will be my Mid Term exam. Gosh! this is the first in a year I will be going into an examination hall. Brings back memory. Anyhow, i must face this horrible nightmare by myself.

Anyway, there is too much to say right now since I left this blog since Ramadhan and now its been 2 months. The only thing that interesting than the most was when I went to a Camping trip at Cameron Highland. A nostalgic moment happens there and most importantly, i got a lot of friends there. I've started to like KL already. haha.

Phrases of the Week: "Human prefer to know the truth no matter how bad its hurt but its easier to know the lie if you can pretend to know the truth.." This is the part when human head started to feel like acid trip which i guess happens to me also. I prefer to know the truth but my heart says let this be a lie because the truth is too much to handle.

Okeyy... I guess nothing else matters for now. If there's time, I shall reveal to you the next Commentaries if I desire to do so.! haha!

Well then, Cherrioo!!
Assalamualaikum....
"Do the right thing even when no one knows it"